Thursday, January 17, 2013

Pedir-ing, and all the things that suck about it.

So I says, “Nyembe, are you really asking me for money to help feed your struggling family?  You literally just gave me a tour of your house where you showed off all your nice toys.  Dude, you have not one, but THREE working computers.  And you use them to run a freaking internet café; the only internet café that I’ve seen in all of Montepuez!  On top of that, you’re the only guy on the block with a copy machine.  You’d have a fucking monopoly with that too if your drunk ass stopped drinking for like two weeks, saved the money, bought the expensive piece you needed to make the damn thing work, and then opened up shop for the world to see.  You literally are the only guy who has the ability utilize the functions of a copy machine.  And with school starting up again, it’s pretty much hunting season for you.  You could make a killing, bro.  Get it together!”

Well, I didn’t really says that, but he did ask me for money.  And he does have the only internet café I’ve come across here in Montepuez. Not sure if it’s functioning right now, but still, it’s the principle of the matter!

If you haven’t noticed, all this pedir-ing is starting to get to me.  To “pedir” means to ask for in Portuguese, and people here love to pedir.  I’m still not sure if it’s cultural, or if it’s just because I’m white (I’m thinking it’s the later…), but not a day goes by where I don’t get 5 or 6 requests for various things.  Usually it’s just money, and people will say “Da-me Cinco,” or “Da-me Dez.”  But sometimes people are more specific and will ask for bread or cigarettes: “Da-me Pao,”  or “Da-me cigarillo.”  No greeting, no superfluous conversation, not even a please. Nada.  Just a “Give me this,” or “Give me that.” 

I have a feeling that it’s cultural things like this that make the first three months the hardest (at least that’s what they tell you…about the first three months that is).  Some days it really starts to wear on me so much so that I don’t want to leave my house.  But, I know better, and I have yet to let it get me to the point where I want to lock myself in the house, close all the curtains, get in bed and tuck in the mosquito net.  I won’t lie, I’ve definitely thought about it though…

UPDATE:  I wrote the previous section two weeks ago, but have waited a while to post it.  I usually like to do this so I can post a bunch of things at once.  Either way, it’s funny to look back on this know and think about how frustrated I actually was.  Things have changed drastically since then, and I think I can credit it to taking a new approach towards combating what is by far my east favorite aspect of Mozambican culture.  Now a days, when I get asked for something, I usually reply that I’m a professor and can give classes, not money.  Then, I’ll ask the pedir-er if they’d like to learn some physics. 

Usually people hate the idea of school, so they’ll decline with an irritated tone and let me go on my merry way.  If they say yes though, that’s when the fun begins.  If they accept my offer, I then try and whip out a quick and dirty summary of one of the lessons I’ve been preparing, or one I gave earlier in the week.  On-the-fly lessons I’ve given so far have included demonstrations of gravity, an introduction to waves, a discussion of thermodynamics, and a disgusting attempt at describing Schrodinger’s Box in Portuguese.  Sometimes though, if they are drunk and persistent or just really being a pain, I’ll start lecturing them in English about a variety of topics.  Most of the time it’s themed around how ridiculous it is that they are asking me to give them money so that they can get drunk. It not the nicest thing to say, but I’m comforted by the fact that they really can’t understand it anyway.  Also, it’s really therapeutic.  Like venting to someone.  

Either way, my new method has been working.  I’m happy, and most of the time, they seem to be happy too.  Pedir-ing will be something I’ll continue to have to deal with throughout my time here.  I can accept that.  Even though I don’t look forward to being asked for things continuously, I do look forward to coming up with new, creative ways to change the topic or say no.  Or to just have a little therapy time and get something of my chest.

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